This child is just so..........

I had a list of things to conquer this morning and Tate was being his usual difficult self so even though it was only 9:30 in the morning I gave him a little box of nerds to entertain him. (giving this kid sugar is like fighting fire with fire so I don't really know what the old brain of mine was thinking.) Well, it seemed to do the trick and I had a kid that disappeared for a great length of time. When I went to check on him I asked if he ate all of his candy and he just looked up at me with a great big smile- "Just my nose says thank you mommy!" What does that mean I wondered- "Say it again Tate"- "My nose say thank you for that treat that was deeeeeelicious!" upon closer examination I see that there are bright pink nerds hanging out of Tate's nostrils. "What the honk Tate!?! did you put your candy in your nose?!?" I began to get a little frantic remembering how my cousin put a button up her nose when we were little and it had to get removed by the doctor and also my niece put a plastic bottle wrapper up her nose and had to make the same trip! I asked Tate if he could blow the candy out of his nose- he tried and the little guys just started flying out as if he was a machine gun. This only made him happier about what he had done so I was scared he would now want to put anything he could in his nose in order to become the human semi-automatic weapon! What do I do in a situation like this?- I lie........ "Tate, if you stick things up your nose it will make you throw up. (he has a huge fear of throwing up) so you better not ever do that again- plus some things get stuck real good and you would have to go to the doctors office to get it yanked out and it hurts- bad!" He looked at me thoughtfully and then sat down and said "Thanks for saving me, mommy." hilarious. and if this wasn't all bad enough, the child began walking around his room and popping the booger nerds right into his mouth!!!!! I had to leave the room for fear that I would throw up. Kind of a gross blog entry- sorry!